2016 was the year I said F-you to my word of the year. Then, I proclaimed 2017 the year of the warrior.
And in many ways, it was.
I found myself fighting to heal my health, my relationships and my spirituality. I was fighting my own desire to stay safe and comfortable more than anything else. I hid in the safety of sameness but I needed change.
And change isn’t usually comfortable.
I’ve been my own worst enemy for years. I did what I believed would keep myself and everyone I loved safe and happy. The surprise was that the opposite was true. My people-pleasing ways don’t serve myself or anyone else.
So, I “warriored” up for some big changes.
Although, I wrestled with it all year, I changed my way of eating and my stance on self-care. My husband and I traveled to spend a week to Sedona, Arizona for a Couple’s Soul Adventure to heal childhood wounds and start fresh in our relationship. I followed my heart to change my spiritual practice in ways that added more depth and richness.
Warriors get messy and I got messy.
Not in the way I planned to.
I was supposed to take sword lessons.
I was supposed be a badass business woman.
I was supposed to become a strong leader and take no crap.
Instead, I bared my soul to my husband and created space for him to do the same. I learned that inside we are both scared kids who deserve love and compassion. And knowing this makes a huge difference but it doesn’t change everything overnight. We are working daily to grow closer and create a safe home base for each other.
I battled with my health and finally determined true self-love isn’t just candles and chocolates in the bathtub. It required more giving myself what I need to heal even if it’s not always fun in the moment. Following the guidelines that worked for me created shifts slowly. I know I’ll have to continue the practice of tough love to complete my healing.
My spiritual growth had become stagnate so I looked beyond the law of attraction, reaching to the occult practices of alchemy. I began making daily offerings, working with archetypes and holding hands with my shadow. Day by day, these actions changed me even as a feared I’d be judged for not being all sunshine and rainbows. This journey will continue to stretch me as I work with energies, plants and elements in the new year.
I turns out I fought because I had to. The pain of staying the same became to greater than the fear of change.
The Aries Rising in my astrology chart loved the warrior motif. Charge in and fight and get things moving quickly.
But my Virgo Sun longs for stability and connection. More earth, less fire.
The lesson I learned this year is that there is a time for fighting and being a warrior but after the battles are fought, the victory blooms when warrior becomes a farmer and tends to their spoils and makes them into something beautiful. That’s why my word for 2018 has revealed its self to be Steadfast.
In 2018, I’ll be STEADFAST.
Steadfast, truly loving myself and others. Day by day, growing my relationship with myself and the people I love one caring action at a time.
Steadfast, feeding and nourishing my body and listening to its needs.
Steadfast, reinventing my marriage by creating a safe space for honesty, healing and growth.
Steadfast, serving people through my business and vows I’ve made to myself and the universe.
Steadfast, walking the path of Daily Alchemy. Riding the hedge between the material world and the spiritual, blending them in a practical yet magical way.
Letting go of rushing and allowing myself to tend my goals daily with loving care will yield a perfect bounty in 2018. I am reminded that being “steady” is more “fast” than chaotically striking out at my fears with swords and anger.
This year, I will snuggle in and create a harvest day by day.
I can be patient and I can let the magic of 2018 reveal itself in quiet moments. I will work with tides and not against them.
This warrior is turning her sword into a plow and is ready to slow down and listen to her heart, and the heart of Mother Earth.
How about you? What word whispers to your heart for 2018? I’d love to hear about your word and the journey you are embarking on to Be Magic in 2018.
Namaste & Hugs,
Michelle Martin Dobbins