Couldn’t you just…
Couldn’t you just…
How to do we make decisions? A lot of controversy has been stirred up around Angelina Jolie’s decision to have a preventative double mastectomy. Some say she is courageous and others think she is making fear-based decisions. Abraham-Hicks say it doesn’t matter what we do, but how we feel about it. That’s why the same actions have different results for different people. I think only Angelina knows if her decision is right for her by how she feels about it deep down.
I’ve been criticized for making a different choice about my health. I have chosen, for now, not to get mammograms. I turned forty a few years back and my doctor advised me that it was time. I researched it and I chose to do what felt best for my health, which was to employ a variety of natural cancer preventative measures and to have bi-annual breast thermograms. My doctor vehemently disagreed and told me that I might be able to get away with that choice for a few years but she didn’t know how long “they” would let me not get mammograms. Wow! I chose to get a new doctor.
I share this not to be critical of anyones choices, but to say that maybe we can all make the correct choice for ourselves, even when our choices are different. For some women I’m certain mammograms are the right choice, just as I am certain that right now for me they are not. I believe the more secure we feel in the decisions we make for ourselves the less likely we are to have anyone question them. If we don’t resist other opinions, they probably won’t continue to share them with us. However, I’ve had well-meaning people ask me “Couldn’t you just get a mammogram, what’s the big deal?”
Hello! The big deal is being authentic and following my feel good, not anyone else’s. When someone asks me “couldn’t you”, they are usually asking me to do what everyone else is doing, even though it doesn’t feel right to me.
Examples in my life are:
Couldn’t you just get a real job?
Couldn’t you cut your hair?
Couldn’t you just put your baby in day care?
Couldn’t you dress more conservatively?
Couldn’t you just have your baby in the hospital like everyone else?
Couldn’t you give you babies a little formula?
Couldn’t your kids just go to their neighborhood school?
You might have the exact opposite questions asked of you, for example: Couldn’t you quit working and take care of your kids? Maybe people asked Angelina why couldn’t she just get checked every three months. Everybody will make different decisions about what is right for them. Then, we need to stick by what feels right for us and let other people’s questioning go. I used to get upset by these “couldn’t you” questions but now, I just say “I could, but right now I’m choosing to…”
Jannette Dalgliesh’s 30 day Giving Up Should group has helped me to really focus on the decisions I’m making and if I’m making choices based on what I should do or what I really want to do. I invite you to check in with your higher self when you make big and small decisions. There are no wrong choices, but the ones that are in alignment with our true selves are more fun. Jeannette Maw is activationing Peace with Not Knowing which is great way to feel better about our decisions.
How do you check in to make important decisions and how do you handle criticism of your choices? I’d love to hear from you. To prove it, I’m giving away one of my Angel Card readings (see service page) to one of my commenters during the month of May. I’ll put everyone’s name in random.org and choose a winner to be announced here around June 1st. Then I’ll email the winner with the details if I have access to their e-mail or you can check back here around the first and e-mail me if you’re the winner.